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The Science of Encouragement

Posted on by Alexis Oyediran

Authored by Whitney Raglin Bignall, PhD, Pediatric Psychologist and Associate Clinical Director of The Kids Mental Health Foundation.

Want to increase your child’s confidence, and keep them striving and motivated when things get tough? A great place to start is with encouragement!

What is encouragement, and how can we get better at it?

Encouragement is words or nonverbal actions (such as a thumbs up) that help or grow someone’s feelings or thoughts about themselves. Encouragement focuses more on effort, the person’s character and abilities.  Scientific studies show that encouragement helps to improve confidence and self-esteem. And that’s great for a child’s mental health.

Receiving encouragement causes our brain to send signals of pleasure and rewards. Those signals motivate us to continue the behavior that was encouraged. It also activates the part of the brain that allows us to plan and make decisions.

Practicing Encouragement

 As with anything, the more we practice the better we get. To increase encouragement:

Notice what they are doing right. This can be the hardest part! We’re often zooming in on behavior that is challenging or difficult. Instead, look for the behaviors and effort that’s helpful or positive.

Come up with specific praise or affirmation to encourage more of that behavior. Rather than “Great job” or “Way to go!,” try something like, “I love how you offered to share your cape with your friend as soon as they asked,” or “I see how hard you are working to bring up your grades. I really appreciate your effort.”

Praise and affirmation can go beyond behavior. You can notice things about the child’s personality and give encouragement about that. This could be, “I’ve noticed how you pay attention when others are talking” or “You really feel things deeply, which shows that you care about others.” These kinds of statements are also encouraging for children, which is good for their mental health.

Take a few moments to give them your full attention. Kids value your attention, so making eye contact, ignoring distractions for a few moments and talking to them will encourage them.

Small Gestures Can Have Big Impact

While words are a great way to encourage kids and specific words are even more powerful, small gestures can also have the same effect.

If a child is struggling, making eye contact and giving them an encouraging smile or nod can give them a boost. A high five or hug can also be helpful.

Whatever you try, know that your words and actions can be a powerful force for encouraging a child in your life. And when you develop a habit of providing encouragement, you deepen the connection between the two of you.

A great time to start is Camp Fire’s Absolutely Incredible Kid Day® on March 20, but you can begin at any time.

Who needs your encouragement?

Citation:

Wong, Y. J. (2015). The psychology of encouragement: Theory, research, and applications. The Counseling Psychologist, 43(2), 178-216.

Absolutely Incredible Kid Day®
March 20

Let’s make sure kids know they matter—not for their grades, trophies, or achievements, but for who they truly are. Take a moment today to remind a child in your life that they are enough—exactly as they are. 

Participating in #KidDay #AIKD is a simple, meaningful way to let young people know how much they are appreciated. 

Here are some resources to help write a kid in your life: 

Go Outside

Posted on by Alexis Oyediran

With People!

Have you had one of those days (or weeks or years) when you look around and think, “Where is everybody?” Maybe you moved to a new place or went through a hard time or got sick. Maybe your social circles changed — or you did. Maybe you don’t have a lot of places in your neighborhood to meet people. Maybe the apps on your phone are designed to keep you scrolling, not reaching out. (Maybe? Definitely.)

If you’ve felt lonely lately, you’re not ironically not alone. 

  • Young people’s loneliness rates have increased every year since 1976.1 
  • Almost half of adults in the U.S. say they feel lonely.1
  • Between 2003 and 2020, the amount of time Americans spend with friends went from an average of an hour a day to 20 minutes.1

Loneliness has been getting more press since the pandemic, and we’ve been getting better about talking about it. People have a lot of ideas on how to strengthen social connections, including social media reform, better social infrastructure and expanded mental health services. 

We’d like to bump a low-cost anti-loneliness tool to the top of the list: Go outside. Preferably with people. 

Sofia Rodriguez, Camp Fire National Youth Advisory Cabinet member, explains: 

“When you’re inside a building or in your house, you’re trapped in this feeling that you’re the main character,” said Sofia. “I’m the only one feeling like this. It’s all about me. But when you go outside, you think: Oh, my gosh, I’m small!” 

That “small” feeling is a powerful dose of perspective that can combat isolation.

“It’s a good feeling,” Sofia said. “There’s more than just me: There’s a world around me!” 

Sofia outside playing with leaves in front of a pond with a goat standing next to her.

And while Sofia’s word and our own experiences at Camp Fire are enough to convince us, science is on our side, too. A recent review of 38 different nature-based loneliness studies said that “social, nature-based activities show promise in reducing youth loneliness.”2

Sofia’s favorite local nature haunt is Flowing Lake County Park. They go there for Camp Fire club meetings sometimes, but Sofia and their three siblings get a lot of outdoor time living on a farm as well. 

Sofia leaning against a tree and is playing outside with her two siblings.

“My mom is really into throwing us outside,” they laughed. “Whenever we can, we go.” 

They feel lucky to live in Snohomish County, Washington, where there’s a lot of access to nature. Sofia is aware of safety issues: They know to go with family or friends, avoid unsafe areas and stay out of polluted water sources. But overall, nature is a source of peace, tranquility and fun for Sofia.

“It makes me feel more connected,” they said. “People usually slow down when they are outside. It makes them pay attention a bit more.” 

The ability to slow down, focus and build connections with both humans and nature is practically a superpower in our age of distraction and worry. When we feel isolated, it’s easy to be overwhelmed by the problems facing us today. In fact, recent research is uncovering a link between loneliness and climate anxiety. 

“In Washington state, we’re seeing heat waves and forest fires,” said Sofia, who did a climate change workshop with their 4-H equity and inclusion task force last year. “I think about it often.” 

Without a connection to others or the outdoors, climate change can feel hopeless. But getting outdoors with others, like Sofia does, is a way to both appreciate our place in nature and build the collaborative networks we need to save it.    

The best thing? You don’t have to be an extreme wilderness adventurer or join an expensive expedition team to get the mental health and social benefits of being in nature. Invite a coworker to take a lunch break outside. Ask your study group if you can do your next session under a tree. Look for outdoor hangout spots for your next friend catch-up. Scope out your local library or county/state park for free workshops or classes. Join or volunteer at your local Camp Fire affiliate.

“It doesn’t have to be a park or a hike or something that’s purposefully a Nature Experience,” said Sofia. “It can be going outside somewhere where it’s a little more peaceful, somewhere where you can take a deep breath and think, ‘I’m here right now. There’s a world around me.’”

Find an outdoor Camp Fire program near you. 

Sofia smiling on a boat in a body of water.
  1. “Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation: The U.S. Surgeon General’s Advisory on the Healing Effects of Social Connection and Community,” 2023. United Public Health Service. Accessed 13 July 2024.
  2. “Connecting through nature: A systematic review of the effectiveness of nature-based social prescribing practices to combat loneliness,” by Sachs et al. Landscape and Urban Planning. Vol 248, August 2024. Accessed 13 July 2024.

[INFOGRAPHIC] 3 Simple Ways to Grow a Growth Mindset

Posted on by Erin Risner

A growth mindset is an essential building block of thriving—for kids, teens, and adults!
What are some practical tools for boosting our ability to change, learn and improve?

You can encourage the kids and teens you know and teach them to how to develop a growth mindset.

And if you’re looking for more ways on how to encourage the youth in your life, here are some more great suggestions for how you praise them, and talk about success and failure.

3 Simple Ways to Grow a Growth Mindset

Kids with a growth mindset are strong & resilient!

Here’s how you can grow one:

Don’t give up!
Why? Developing our sparks takes time, courage and creativity. Passion plus practice is the formula for long-term success.

  • Pay attention to mistakes: What can you learn?
  • Increase your effort
  • Try new strategies
  • Ask for help
  • Practice, practice, practice
  • BELIEVE that you can figure it out!

Take care of your brain!
Why? Our brains need down time, fuel and exercise to work well, just like the rest of our body.

  • Eat good food
  • Get enough sleep (8-11 hours a night)
  • Turn off the screen well before bed Challenge your mind
  • Get outside! Move around!

Learn how to Learn!
Why? Learning is a skill! We can become better learners with attention, practice and experimentation. How do you learn best?

  • Focus on one task at a time
  • Involve all your senses – sight, smell, touch, taste, hear
  • Stay curious
  • Play games
  • Ask your friends or family how they like to learn

SOURCES:

“Mindset Matters” Camp Fire Learning Lab [Internal Training Platform]. 2017.

“Brain Toolkit: An Owner’s Manual for the Teenage Brain.” Step it Up 2 Thrive. July 28, 2011. The Thrive Foundation for Youth.

Growth Mindset: Your Key to Thriving

Posted on by Erin Risner

Teens embody a growth mindset on the high ropes course at Camp Fire Columbia’s Camp Namanu, outside of Portland, Oregon, in August 2017

Do you believe people can change? Do you think we can grow? Do you consider things like intelligence, talents and skills prizes of a random genetic lottery or qualities anybody can develop with time and tenacity?

Camp Fire is built around the belief that we can boost our smarts, develop new skills (or lose them if we don’t practice) and learn new ways to, well, learn.

In the Camp Fire world, mistakes aren’t failures; they are an important part of how we grow.

This approach to life and learning is called a growth mindset, and it permeates Camp Fire’s culture.

In the words of Stanford’s Dr. Carol Dweck, “In a growth mindset, people believe that their most basic abilities can be developed through dedication and hard work—brains and talent are just the starting point. This view creates a love of learning and a resilience that is essential for great accomplishment.”

Love of learning? Check. Resilience? Yep. We’re all about that. Once kids and teens have found their sparks, a growth mindset arms them with the curiosity and grit to develop them.

How do you know if you have a growth mindset? As yourself a few simple questions (or take Dr. Dweck’s in-depth quiz, if you have more time).

If you nodded yup to 2 and 4, you’re working that growth mindset like a boss. If you answered yeah, probably to 1 and 3, you are likely operating out of a fixed mindset.

  1. When you describe your own skills and talents, do you generally say they are things you were born with…
  2. …or things you worked hard to develop?
  3. When you run into a challenge, do you often blame the problem on a personal lack (“I’m just not creative”)…
  4. …or get curious about what you could change to find a solution?

A fixed mindset is the opposite of a growth mindset. It assumes intelligence and talents are innate: you either have them or you don’t. If we don’t question that mindset, we’re left feeling anxious that we don’t have what it takes to overcome obstacles…and can’t do anything to change those deficiencies.

Fortunately, neuroscience shows us that our brains are malleable. Our brains grow when we use them—just like our muscles. We can teach ourselves to adopt a growth mindset, just like any other skill. We can change! That’s good news because having a growth mindset is scientifically linked to all kinds of great stuff, including higher parental school involvement, the ability to weather traumatic events, and lower rates of childhood depression and anxiety.

We’re going to spend September exploring growth mindsets here on the blog and across our social media accounts. Follow along and join in the #growthmindset conversation!

[INFOGRAPHIC] 16 Reasons Sparks are Awesome—Science Says!

Posted on by Erin Risner

We know that Sparks are talents, interests, commitments and qualities that give kids—and adults—energy and purpose. We also know that it’s important to talk to kids about their Sparks and support them in their passions.
But why? Why is it so important? Why do Sparks matter?

Because SPARKS lead to some pretty huge benefits.

Research shows that kids and teens who identify their Sparks, and nurture them with help from supportive adults, thrive. In so many ways, across all areas of life.

Kids who nurture their sparks with adult support are more likely to

  • Attend school…
  • …and be engaged there
  • Get good grades
    • 70% get a 3.5 GPA or higher!
  • Be healthy
  • Care for the environment
  • Be less depressed and anxious
  • Have a positive attitude
  • Have good social skills
  • Feel they have a purpose in life
  • Take fewer risks
    • with substance abuse, violence and unsafe sex
  • Be satisfied with life
  • Be adaptable
  • Volunteer to serve others
  • Have more energy and confidence
  • Be creative
  • Have hope for their future

SOURCES:

Benson, Peter L., (2008) Sparks: How Parents Can Ignite the Hidden Strengths of Teenagers. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.
Camp Fire. “Our Framework Ensures that Youth Thrive.” Campfire.org. 2017.
Search Institute. “Finding the Student Spark,” Insights & Evidence. November 2010.
Search Institute. “Sparks: A Gateway to Developmental Relationships.” search-institute.org. 2017.

Thanks Kate Sherron for this Sparks infographic!

15 Questions to Spark a Sparks Conversation

Posted on by Erin Risner

Thirty-eight percent of kids don’t know what their spark is. They haven’t yet discovered what gets them excited, pushes them to learn and gives them purpose.

We know that sparks are the first step to thriving—to creating a healthy, purposeful life. What can help kids find their spark?

We can. But research shows that adults don’t always know it’s important to be spark-proactive. Only 55 percent of kids say they get support for their sparks from adults.

Adults are critical in kids’ sparks journeys. Not because we can assign passions to sparkless kids. But because we can get kids thinking and talking about sparks. We can earn their trust, start conversations and name the sparks we see come alive.

Adam Kisler, Camp Fire Heartland’s program manager, says it’s important to have sparks conversations in the context of a solid relationship.

Adam Kisler leading kids in an activity at Camp Maple Woods summer day camp on July 13, 2017.
Adam Kisler leading kids in an activity at Camp Maple Woods summer day camp on July 13, 2017.

“We want kids to know we’re not just one more person in their life who is going to tell them what to do.” Kisler says. “We want them to know people care about them and we’re not going anywhere.”

Building trust takes time, and good conversations take attention. Kisler says adults need to be careful not to talk too much. We can easily drown out a kid’s own passion by talking too much about our own! Remember to get down on their level—literally sit, bend or crouch down—and make good eye contact.

Once you’ve built up a solid foundation of trust, you’ve earned the right to start talking about sparks.

“Sparks questions are only as good as the atmosphere and trust we build around these kids,” Kisler says.

But sometimes we just don’t know what to say to spark the spark, you know?

Kisler likes to get kids started with questions that are really easy for kids to answer. Over time, Kisler and his Camp Fire staff build on those initial conversations by exposing kids to all kinds of possible sparks…and see what clicks.

  • What are your hobbies?
  • What do you like to watch on TV?
  • What’s been the most exciting part of your summer so far?
  • What did you do this weekend?
  • What do you enjoy about that [hobby, show, thing you did]?
  • Why do you think you enjoyed it?


If you have a close relationship with a kid who digs deep conversations, try Thrive Foundation for Youth’s suggestions. These questions start simple and get more complex:

Once sparks have become a common conversation topic, you can ask kids how you can help with their spark development. Try these questions from Dr. Peter L. Benson’s influential TED talk on sparks.

  • What gives you joy when you do it?
  • What interests or subjects are you really passionate about?
  • What difference does what you do make to the world around you?
  • Why is who you are and what you do important to you and the world beyond you?

Don’t forget: We’re in these sparks conversations together! Kids need more than just family members invested in their sparks. In Dr. Benson’s TEDx talk, he reminds us that kids with at least three grown-up Spark Champions just do better than those without adult support.

  • What is your spark?
  • Who knows it?
  • How can I help?
  • Where do you express it?
  • What gets in the way?

That’s where Camp Fire comes in. We train our staff and volunteers to support kids’ passions. And our programs are designed connect kids and teens to their next Spark Champion. Find your Camp Fire, find your spark!

Sparks help kids thrive!

Posted on by Erin Risner

If you’ve been around Camp Fire for half a minute, you’ve heard about sparks. And you know we’re not just talking about fire-building skills. We’re talking about life-building passions that put kids on the path to truly thriving.
Sparks are talents, interests, commitments and qualities that give kids—and adults—energy and purpose.

Simply put, sparks are things you both love do to and want to do.

Sparks play a big role in the positive youth development movement. In the past decade, researchers with the Thrive Foundation for Youth, Search Institute and others have studied how kids discover, nurture and grow their sparks.

Kids at Camp Fire Heart of Oklahoma
Camp Fire Heart of Oklahoma

Let’s get a little technical. Sparks guru Dr. Peter L. Benson and Peter C. Scales write in the Encyclopedia of Adolescence (2011) that sparks can:
So what do American kids say their sparks are? The Search Institute has catalogued 200+ sparks reported by thousands of American teens. The most common categories of sparks are the arts (54 percent of kids name a creative spark), learning, reading, athletics and volunteering.

  • Be an inner passion, interest or talent that is central to a person’s identity.
  • Originate from inside a person, rather than being imposed from the outside.
  • Be a source of intrinsic motivation, meaning and self-directed action that can help drive young people forth in other areas.

But the full list is long, varied and always expanding. From telling jokes to creating business plans to peacemaking to studying sacred books…anything can be a spark. If it gives a kid big-time joy and drives them forward in life, it’s a spark.

Although 100 percent of teenagers want to have a life-changing spark (or two!), only 62 percent have identified that purposeful passion.

Camp Fire exists to help kids find their sparks—and help adults become Spark Champions for the kids we serve. It’s the very first step in our Thrive{ology} framework, developed with our fellow spark-advocates, the Thrive Foundation for Youth.

Do you know a kid who needs to find a spark? A kid whose spark needs a little fuel to grow? A kid who needs a few more Spark Champions in her life? Camp Fire has programs to help kids discover and develop their sparks all year long. Find one by you! #FindYourSpark

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